I was thinking today. Alaska is a brand and we need to brand it. I travel a lot and find myself in many different hotel rooms, much of which I don’t care to comment on. Traveling alone is it’s own experience, you learn many things about other travelers, about airlines, hotels, rental car agencies etc. you learn what you like, you learn what you don’t like. But I want to talk about Alaska, besides the fact that you are leaving one of the most beautiful places on the earth and you land in Colorado, you land in New Mexico, you fly over the bay area, or hover into Tucson… you land and mostly figure out ways to adjust to the heat, yes the heat, everything is hot to us folks from Alaska (except when we land in Hawaii, we want this, Hawaii has got it going on girl), there is never an Alaskan that gets off the plane in Hawaii and says, “holy shit it is hot here” why is that? Instead they get off the plane are like, “paradise” I think this is because of branding, I think this is because they are both awesome places to live, but I think more it is because they are just fucking awesome geographical anomalies. When you step off the plane in Alaska it is on, you are on, every sense is heightening, when you step of a plane in Duluth Minnesota, you are like, “yeah, muskrats”
So, long story short, when landing in all of these places, the first thing I do is go to the hotel room and try and find the Alaskan shows. TV is weird to me now. My family and I don’t have TV, we have you tube, Instagram and all that shit, we don’t have cable. So, I can honestly tell you TV is shit, so if you have to watch TV here are some of my recommends.
1. Sports center: it is easy, no politics or bullshit… just dumb shit that doesn’t really matter.
2. Local news: this is good only for weather and stuff to talk about with the folks you are working with.
3. NPR/PBS this is actually the primary viewing channel but it is never there.
4. Soccer: there is never any soccer
5. VICE: but I can watch that on my computer, and it really doesn’t exist outside of a mobile platform, it is all just a rerun, like the first days of CNN. It will be our next CNN.
6. Yukon men: this seems sort of real to me
7. Alaska the last frontier: I recommend you don’t watch these guys. They are four miles form a Walmart.
8. Seriously, my wife just called me, my kid just broke his arm four the 3rd time, he is only six, how may trees are you fucking climbing at the age of six that you fall out of? I told you about all those low lying weak branches.
9. Bush people is fucking horrible; they are not even from here. They are going to jail because they are not from here.
10. Alaskan State Troopers: I have an issue with this because we are arresting young native kids over and over again, it is like Cops in Alaska, ok colored folks, lets film this shit.
11. Deadliest Catch: poofs
12. We have salmon swimming beneath our feet.
13. I have lived in Alaska, it is nothing new.
I want to….