Hey James,
I was just thinking about you & wanted to say HOLA. I was also thinking about free radicals, and high fiber diets, and why it is that some pillows create sore, stiff necks in the morning. How is it that a pillow can do that much damage, create that much carnage? I am mystified, and I can’t look over my left shoulder. Now I have to go and spend like forty bucks, and those are 40 dollars that I JUST DON’T HAVE, for a better goddamn pillow. Sorry, does using the “lord’s” name in vain bother you? I apologize. As well, if it DOES bother you, then I imagine that putting some condescending “quotations” around his “title” of “lord” would also probably give rise to anger within thee. But heed these saintly words, “thou shalt not kill.”
It’s a lot of sun and good weather around here, and when writing this I am conveniently forgetting the hail storms, lightning, and funnel clouds of Tuesday last. Oh yeah, life sucked. It was so flippin’ cold around here (and Mel of course has disabled the heat, typical penny-pinching maneuver) that I SWEAR TO YOU, I would not lie about this, I almost – ALMOST – considered putting on a uniform.
In the end, I was able to scrounge enough of my own clothes that I wasn’t forced to do the “sniff” test in the uniform room, ie “THREADS,” in an effort to acquire a “clean” uniform.
In general, I TRULY DESPISE when people use “too many” quotation marks in their writing. It is so “gay.” Which, as humor would have it, is a phrase that Erin used with me just a few weeks ago. “That’s so GAY,” she said – and our conversation continued without pause or interruption. HOWEVER, the next day (after she’d been moping around for several hours getting nothing done, talking way too much to Beth, smoking cigarette after cigarette with Sharon, etc) she told me, “Monique, I said something yesterday that didn’t make me very proud….” It was the GAY comment, can you believe it!?
Good for her, standing up for diversity and all that other gay crap.
Where are you, what are you doing, why are you absent from my life?
[TO WHICH I REPLIED]
Hello dear fan,
I really don't know who you are or how you found out about wrldmrine.com, but it looks like you have done some extensive research, or at least know people that I know. that is cool, but quite frankly it scares the crap out of me. Are you a woman? I imagine that you are a woman. A lesbian woman. I also imagine that you are hot and most likely well endowed, and that you swing both ways. and that somewhere along the line, on a mild warm summer day you will invite me over. you and your girlfriend will be drinking white wine from crystal vase looking thing. there will also be apples slices and sharp chedder chesse. you and your girlfriend will take turns taking the slices of apple and chesse with in your teeth, and bitting them from the others grasp. your mouths will become sea cucumbers, like the pinkness of and unsheved whale penis, and your females organs will begine to glisten in the thought that i am watching you. something is missing and you want to know what it is, you want to experience it, to taste it, to roll it round in each others mouths until its gunk bolts buttermilk upon your tits. you want cock, both you and your girlfriend, how can I blame you? is this true, is this what you want from me? suddenly I am not scared to meet you. what are you guys doing later this week?
[TO WHICH SHE REPLIED BACK]
Not only did I write you yesterday, but you THOUGHT of me! Amazing, this synchronicity. Alarming, in fact. But happy. thanks for the timely reply. Awesome to know you’re back in the area and are engaged in your own reality show…that of LIFE. Here. One in which beauty is evident everywhere, and you are on an island: which means you have a captive audience of possible bedtime hosts. (should I say hostesses?)
I should say you are toiling, albeit in the fabulous sunshine of the San Juans, on decks near hot tubs, even those that once possibly held you and last night’s “romantic” tryst, how should I know?
You have arrived, you are certainly correct: the San Juans are tremendously beautiful. You are seeing orcas, named for the whales’ behavior (having to do with netherregions)…”Orcinus Orca,” and not for the Count of Revillagigedo, Don Juan Vicente de Güemes Pacheco de Padilla y Horcasitas, who was the Viceroy of New Spain in the late 18th century & for whom Orcas Island was named. (check it, I’m fucking smart, I know these things).
What is up with your place at the “CASTLE?” You can be honest with me, after all I’m gay and you have never tried to jump my bones. We have a bond, a connection. Plus, you are a writer, and I am a slacker, which boils us both down to the same thing.
Did you know that orcas (especially males) often engage in homoerotic behavior shortly before engaging in heterosexual & therefore reproductive behavior? Check it out at national geographic dot com.
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